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Let them be kids. So often as adults we try to dic

Let them be kids. So often as adults we try to dictate the play. I think it’s because, like the loudest kid in the group, we want to have our way. Be on our phone. Tackle our to-do list. Or at the very least play something that’s remotely interesting to us.
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But when we do that, we too easily miss out on discovering what our kid’s interests are. Finding what makes them come alive.
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I had a mom of a 12-year-old say to me one time, “Josh, my son is learning to rap and I have no idea what to do.”
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So I asked two questions: 1. Is he hanging with kids he shouldn’t be hanging out with with? Because bad company corrupts good character. She said, “No, he has really good friends.”
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2. Then, I asked, is he listening to music degrading to women or lyrics otherwise disrespectful or crude? Her response, “Oh no, he listens to @lecrae .
Finally, I said to her, “Then I have only one piece of advice for you. Learn to rap.”
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Friends, if we don’t become students of our kid’s interests by entering their world and letting them teach us, then they’ll find someone who will rap with them, play video games with them, dance with them, play Legos with them, and fill in the blank. The list goes on. What happens when we say “no” is that we just build a massive wall between their heart and ours.
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The other night, our kids wanted to pull out the stage lights and hold a concert for us. Truth be told, I didn’t want to pull out the lights and stage because they were tucked away in the garage and it was already getting late. But I was determined to say “yes.” So we moved the furniture on the back deck and created an outdoor stage because the weather was amazing. This was the first “concert” we attended where all but one song was either written by our kids or made up on the spot.
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These two love music. And we love entering into their world and giving them “the stage” to pursue their passions and find their gifts.
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Tonight, I’m grateful for the time we get now to get to enter their world and let them be kids. What have you said “yes” to this week?
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#famousathome

We could all use a feelings chart right now. What

We could all use a feelings chart right now. What are you feeling today?
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#whatamifeelingbook
graphics: @itsjanebutler

There is no better time to talk to your kids about

There is no better time to talk to your kids about their feelings than right now. In fact, we could all use a good listening ear as we navigate these trying times.

Tonight, as our kids were reading #whatamifeelingbook , the star of the book himself, Copper, sat up to listen. For #nationalpuppyday he too shared his feelings about having everyone at home. Verdict: Copper is thrilled!
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What have your kids, and pets, been feeling?

Research (by Stanley Greenspan) shows 20 minutes o

Research (by Stanley Greenspan) shows 20 minutes of command-free time is gold for our child’s brain.

Command-free time is child-led play, where we do what they want to do. As parents, we don’t dictate the play. We get on the floor and enter into their world.

If they want to play trains, go to the island of Sodor. If they want to have a tea party, add sweetener. If they want to make up a life-sized board game with the couch cushions, praise them for their creativity (that was my night tonight!).
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Sometimes, entering our child’s world is very difficult. But do it. Put your to-do list away, turn your phone off, and give your child the exact thing he / she craves—your undivided attention and time.

You’ll come to find that it was really the best part of YOUR day!

#famousathome

・・・ The word, unprecedented, means “never

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The word, unprecedented, means “never done or known before.” For certain, the social distancing to flatten the curve of #coronavirus has never been done or known before in our lifetime.

For many of us, neither has unadulterated time with our kids. No sports on in the background. No fantasy leagues or brackets to watch on our phone. No school for our kids. No bars to visit. And work from home policies in place. In other words, unprecedented time at home—time we’ve never before known.

And your child’s heart. Do you know the number of things about your kids you don’t know? The questions they have. The prayers they pray. The wishes they hope for. The games they love. The interests they have. The hobbies they want to pursue. In other words, unprecedented time for your child’s heart—a heart not fully known before.

And to do the things you’ve always said you would, but didn’t have time for. The hikes. The board games. The woodworking. The bike rides. The nail painting. The tea party. The Legos. The one-on-one dates. In other words, unprecedented time for activities we’ve not done before.

Yet, for your kids, it’s not about the time. It was never was. It’s about you. You being there. All there. No sports. No distractions. No school.

You. Showing up. Becoming famous to your kids.

Let’s make this moment in time unprecedented as fathers, not merely because we distanced ourselves, but because we drew closer.

Tag a dad in the comments who deserves to be honored.

@famousathome

@famousathome ・・・ “Yes, dad, I know,” sa

@famousathome
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“Yes, dad, I know,” said our 7-year-old son with a ting of whininess in his voice. “Two times, not just one.” So, we kept scrubbing our hands, standing together in the restaurant bathroom singing “Happy Birthday” for the second time.

Though he never sucked his thumb, he is one of those kids who struggles keeping his fingers away from this mouth.

As parents, I confess, this is one battle we chose not to fight the past few years. Other than a reminder every now and again to stop eating with or licking his fingers, our consistency in enforcing any rules and tenacity to break the habit was lacking.

When the new novel coronavirus, or COVID-19, became not only a global pandemic, but a confirmed local reality, however, we had reason to start being more consistent in how we parent our children around proper hygiene.

Fortunately, it hasn’t taken that long for the healthy behaviors to stick. Our kids just needed parents who enforced habits that were good for them.

Such is where I begin pretty much every conversation when it comes to “parenting” our kids—they do as we do, not as we say.

When we study the data, we can sum up all of parenting research into one primary conclusion: Our kids become who we are.

With that said, here are four ways we can talk to our kids about COVID-19.

Link in bio for full article.

#coronavirus

@famousathome ・・・ In times of crisis, our ki

@famousathome
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In times of crisis, our kids’ greatest need is to feel safe.

In #safehousebook, I write that self-awareness as a parent of what we’re feeling and why we’re feeling that way, is crucial to how safe our children feel.

In other words, don’t expect your kids to remain calm about the #coronavirus while you frantically try to tell them everything will be okay. Our kids feel the discrepancy.

Even worse, the fear lands on them in ways they can’t comprehend because their parent, the one person our kids should be able to talk to about how they’re feeling, is sending the message that he/she can’t handle them anyway.

If you’re afraid of what’s happening, find a trusted friend, pastor, or therapist who can help you process your fear.

Now, more than ever, is our time to be #famousathome
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@joshua.straub

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