Thanks again for your questions. These episodes are gold for us because we get to interact with you, our family of listeners, on a regular basis.
The questions this week are vulnerable and honest. We appreciate that so much about this community. Let’s keep striving to be better spouses, parents, and all out human beings.
This week we discuss:
- How being raised in a legalistic home can impact our own parenting and climate of our home
- How grandparents can influence the spiritual lives of their grandchildren
- How to make Jesus attractive to our kids and grandkids
- The one key factor to faith transmission across the generations
For more information on the findings of the study on faith transmission across the generations, click here to check out Families and Faith: How Religion is Passed Down Across Generations by Vern Bengtson.
#1. My question relates to the spiritual life of my 5 year old daughter. I am a pastor’s kid and was brought up in a very legalistic but loving family. I went astray for a few years of my life but I know for certain that my parent’s prayer is what kept me not too far so that I could come back to Jesus. My husband was brought up in a semi-Christian home, where his mom was/is a very devoted Christian but his dad was/is not. All of this is to give you an idea as to why I am concerned. We both love the Lord, we both serve in the church and are leaders, but we definitely have different views of what a Christian life is or should be.
I am more on the legalistic side, where I put all the burden on him being the head of the family. I feel that if I don’t say “Let’s read the Bible or pray,” we don’t do it. It makes me mad that I have to be the one initiating these times. And so I enter into this guilt trip where if I don’t do it, my fear is that my daughter will not grow up in a Godly home. My husband feels that if we serve in an area at church, we do not need to be involved in anything else. I, on the other side, go the extreme of having to be involved in everything the church offers (to the point that it gives me anxiety if I don’t).
How do I let go of the legalistic way of thinking? No matter what my decision is I feel like I’m letting someone down. And I feel like my daughter is living in an unstable environment when it comes to our spiritual lives.
#2. From Collene: As a grandmother who really failed as a mother, but have sought and received full forgiveness from my son – Praise the Lord, I am puzzled how to be a spiritual guide to my two grandsons, 9 and 12 years old. I don’t get to be around them all the time, but do visit frequently. My son and his wife want their children to be brought up in church (which really didn’t start until 2 years ago). The boys love church and have gone to church camp once last summer. When I ask my grandsons if they would like me to say night time prayers or read the Bible or anything that I would like to do to open the door to spiritual talks they say no. I let it go at that. I grew up in a very strict religious home and was forced to do everything right. So, I guess I am asking for ideas to free our spiritual conversations up. Thank you for your prayers to lead all of us in the Truth of leading our children in His wisdom and love!